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Episode 17 Don’t Care What You Do or Say

September 17, 2011

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Words and Music—Richard Allen
Produced by David Barrett at the Abattoir of Good Taste

Vocal and Guitar—William Thaumatrope
Everything Else—David Barrett

NARRATIVE

I have always had a difficult time with anger. The reasons are obviously personal: I find it hard to “own” the emotion or to feel justified in expressing it. But by appearing as something alien or detached from the self, something unwanted or threatening, anger does not thereby disappear. On the contrary it begins to take on the qualities of its deadly companion, rage, that seems to lurk in the depths like a monster that, if unleashed, will flood the self with an uncontrollable fury.

Emotions are commonly thought to be defined as feelings. There is absolutely no doubt that emotions are something that we feel! Rage is no different from many emotions and moods in the intensity of the feelings it gives rise to. Think of the feelings of anxiety, depression, despair, or fear, to pick out a random list of negative emotions. But try to isolate the feelings that are attached to these emotions: they turn out to be impossible to specify. Feelings, while they accompany emotions, are not sufficient to specify what those emotions are, nor are they the basis for distinguishing moods from emotions. Emotions, unlike moods, have an object. What are you anxious or depressed about? Well, you are just anxious or depressed. Whom do you pity? What are you afraid of? Whom do you love? It is somebody or something? Furthermore, individual emotions are distinguished not by the feelings that they solicit but by the stance or attitude taken by the person who feels the emotion towards the object of the emotion. Someone feeling love adores the object, someone who feels fear runs away from it.

So like anger (and other emotions), rage is characterized not simply by feeling (sensation) but by the object or situation that occasions it: it desires nothing less than its destruction. This is not to say that the feeling that accompanies rage is insignificant. Other than true fear, life threatening fear, which I have never experienced, I cannot think of an emotion whose feelings are more peremptory than rage, which I have experienced only once. It sweeps through your body like a passion and renders one immediately susceptible to violence. But perhaps, too, there is something like a cool rage, a rage that is channeled and controlled by the ego and acts like a slow burning fuse. Perhaps that is the deadliest rage of them all.

LYRIC

Don’t care what you do or say
Never mind I’ll walk away
I can’t take it, I can’t take anymore
Don’t care what you do or say
Never mind I’ll wall away
I can’t take it, I can’t take any more

It crosses my mind that I might still regret
Even though I bet I wouldn’t cry
Lest I reveal the need in me that you met
Which I wish to deny
I wish to deny

Its seems to me that I might be depressed
Though you are impressed by my composure
Don’t want you to think that I had had no rest
From my exposure
From my exposure

Don’t care what you do or say
Never mind I’ll wall away
I can’t take it, I can’t take anymore
Don’t care what you do or say
Never mind I’ll wall away
I can’t take it, I can’t take any more

I ain’t got time to sit around, feeling down
Life’s way too short
So let’s declare a truce and cut it loose
I will abort
I will abort

Am I living, am I lead
Am I breathing, am I dead
The love we had cannot be found
It’s dead and buried underground

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From → Thaumatropemusic

One Comment
  1. Geoff permalink

    Thoughtful analysis of anger and emotions in general. The song has some good rhymes; lyrics do express the various states of anger. I wonder how the song would have sounded if it had been done by Jagger (more shouting and screaming) or Leonard Cohen (more cool, scary, and threatening).

    Well done
    Geoff

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